


Welcome Back

by TooYoungToFeelThisTired



Series: What if? [50]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Alternate Timelines, Author is tired, Cuddling & Snuggling, Domestic Bliss, F/M, Feelings, Five is in his thirteen year old body, Five's POV, Fluff, Healing, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Murder, No incest if you understand Fiveya, Season/Series 01, Sharing a Bed, Tired Number Five | The Boy, Tired Vanya Hargreeves, Touching, Vanya's POV, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, fiveya - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-03
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-16 15:42:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,022
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29827206
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TooYoungToFeelThisTired/pseuds/TooYoungToFeelThisTired
Summary: What-ifs were especially satisfying and cruel in the dark.
Relationships: Number Five | The Boy/Vanya Hargreeves
Series: What if? [50]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1313192
Comments: 12
Kudos: 54





	Welcome Back

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own anything

_'I haven't seen you in a long time, and I don't want to lose you again.'_

Neither Vanya nor Five moved. It felt like the statement cut through some of the tension from before. It wasn't a fight. At least not a typical one, but then again when did the Hargreeves family ever do something typically. It had the potential to become a fight, but Five and Vanya were always the types to leave before things would get too out of hands between them as if even during heated arguments, they sensed that if they stayed, they would say things they didn't mean and unnecessarily hurt one another. It was like that since they were children. Since they were close. It was good to feel that despite everything that did, some things were too stubborn to bend and change with the passing of their time apart.

_Please, don't go._

The seconds before Five turned around to face her again and turn his back to the door felt like an eternity, but once he finally did Vanya looked away suddenly struck with the feeling of a large ball of pressure settling inside her stomach. Something was off about the whole thing. It wasn't right. They were still Vanya and Five, but not completely like they both woke up from a restless night forgetting how to act properly like themselves.

_They were pretenders._

'That's all,' said Vanya hoping to somehow gain some balance wondering if it was too early or late to take another pill. It was hard to look at Five for a moment. She wasn't sure why, but it was. Maybe because she feared she said too much, showed too much, got too emotional. But either way, she knew she needed to distance herself. Perhaps it would have been better for the sake of her mind that he did leave, but even if rationally it made sense, she couldn't bring herself to let him go. Just not tonight. Not like this. Not after she just got him back. She wasn't lying when she said what she did. She knew it wasn't a lie.

Five didn't say anything which only made it worse. He just stood there with an unreadable look on his face that made Vanya a bit nauseous and panicked now.

'And…you know what?' she asked trying to come up with something as she spoke not even sure where she was heading with this, 'It's getting late, and I have lessons early, and I need to sleep, and I'm sure you do too,' she started to walk before she could probably decide if it was the right course of action and picked up some spare blanket and pillow from her closet.

Five didn't move an inch watching her in a way that made her nervous all the more. It was good that he didn't move closer because if he had she wasn't sure she wouldn't take a step back just by how wrecked she felt at that very moment trying to come to terms with what was happening and what it all meant.

'We'll talk in the morning again. Okay?' she asked not even waiting for answering already making her way to her room trying to get as far away from him as possible.

'Night,' she said as she closed the door behind her not sure but pretty positive, she heard a soft _night_ as a reply before the door properly separated them.

Once there was some barrier between them, Vanya allowed her eyes to shut for a second and her hand to press against the wood of her door. It wasn't that she believed Five would try to barge in, and she needed to hold it close, but she did need a second to compose herself deciding that taking another pill this late would be a waste of them.

_He's back._

_He's different._

_He's still Five._

_He has changed._

_Did he though?_

It had been seventeen years. Maybe Five didn't change at all. Maybe it was just that Vanya's memories of him were marked by time. After he disappeared, she felt so alone and depressed, worse than before. The pills took most of it away. Maybe she just imagined him in her mind _nicer, better, more understanding_ than he really was. Maybe she just took a handful of moments she had with him and rebuilt him in her memory as someone who used to be her dearest and closest person in a cruel house where she never fit.

She stepped away from the door and proceeded to her bed turning off the lights. She didn't care if she brushed her teeth or not or if she even forgot to put the blanket over her. All of a sudden she was too tired to care, and just wanted to lie down and forget everything that happened today. Even if she pulled Five's return out of the equation it was still a horribly eventful day that left her tired and emotionally at her limit. It was expected of coming back to the house and seeing everyone, but she still wished she handled it better, and it didn't end up like this.

Although the exhaustion was pretty strong and taking over most of her body, Vanya's mind still started to work on overdrive think and rethinking the events of that day wondering what could she had done differently and what could have happened differently on its own.

_What-ifs were especially satisfying and cruel in the dark._

* * *

Five made it about ten blocks back toward the house before he paused internally groaning at himself and his lack of self-control.

_Idiot_

He turned around avoiding looking at any of the people he passed as if they knew what he was doing and would have shit-eating smirks on their faces.

In his mind, he could still hear a fainted sound of Delores's laughter as she asked, ' _You didn't expect it to be that easy did you now?_ '

Instead of opening the door, this time he simply jumped back into Vanya's living room glancing at the pile of blanket and pillow on the couch left untouched. The door to Vanya's room was still closed which meant she probably didn't even know he left in the first place.

He shouldn't have come back.

He should have returned to the mansion. There was no point for him to come back here after he already decided to leave.

She didn't believe him about the apocalypse. She thought he was messed up in the head. She didn't know him. She didn't know who he had become.

_I haven't seen you in a long time, and I don't want to lose you again._

Ten blocks. Ten blocks of her words haunted him before he finally made the decision to come back. Those words got under his skin. He told himself it didn't matter. Nothing was more important than the apocalypse. He didn't have time to make nice with his siblings, with _her_. But he didn't count on just how stupidly _hard_ it would be to let go of her.

_Ridiculous. Best Assassin in history. Pathetic._

His eyes glanced at the blanket and pillow on the couch for a second before he went to pick them up and jumped into Vanya's bedroom.

It was dark, but he knew the layout as he inspected it upon his arrival at her apartment a couple of hours before.

The brief light coming from behind the curtains helped him make out her silhouette on the bed. It reminded him a bit of the time they were kids, and he would sneak into her room to lay next to her for a bit. He couldn't remember when it started or why. Maybe she had a nightmare? Maybe they used to play a game and decided to just stay in her room? But for as long as he could recall from time to time, he would end up in her closet-size room on her tiny bed with their bodies pressed close to one another drifting to sleep lulled by the warmth of each other marking their dreams as pleasant and nice.

In the dark, it was easy to forget everything else and feel like that thirteen-year-old boy again and her like that thirteen-year-old girl again.

He walked to the other side of her bed and tossed the pillow next to hers. Her bed was bigger now, but he didn't really care. He used to sleep on the cold ground in an unforgiving future wishing for nothing more than to be able to feel her warmth against his body again. Sometimes his dreams granted him his wish, and for those few moments before he properly woke up he could almost feel her there. _Almost_. It was never enough though.

He took off his shoes, tie and jacket before he climbed into her bed. It would be rude otherwise, and he remembered how she tried to look intimidating with her cute pout as she told him not to get dirt from the outside on her bedsheets.

Vanya was awake. She had been since he came into the bedroom, but she didn't voice any objections to anything he did so far, so Five knew it was safe to come close and pull the blanket over them. Before he laid his head against the pillow and closed his eyes, he buried himself against her back and pulled her closer in a protective and comforting way.

It felt the same. Holding her this close to him felt exactly the same. Could it have been all a horrible nightmare? Maybe he never really left. Maybe the last forty-five years never really happened and they were once again just two thirteen-year-olds living inside a mansion filled with cruelty and emotional trauma trying to survive another day in hopes of a better tomorrow. If that was the case, Five wouldn't mind. He would gladly lose his mind if it meant he could have a do-over of all those years with Vanya again.

_What-ifs were especially satisfying and cruel in the dark._

* * *

'What's the matter?' she asked softly into the darkness of her room. At moments like these when the hyperawareness of another person's front pressed against her chest decline, it was easy for everything to feel gentler and sleeper almost on the brick of falling asleep completely.

It took a long while for his voice to appear inside her ear. Long enough that Vanya was sure he wouldn't answer her at all.

'When we're like this…it feels the same,' he spoke with just as soft a voice as hers but the difference of him talking directly to her ear once again causing a shiver to run down her back and bring her back to reality of how they were both just _there._

Vanya licked her lips hoping to calm down enough that Five wouldn't pick up on the sound of her heartbeat so close and loud in the dark.

She understood what he meant of course. When they were like this, in her bed, holding one another in the dark, with Five's body still the same age it was when they did this as children and Vanya never really gaining those few more inches to her height, it felt as if everything that happened in the last seventeen years since they last laid next to each other like this was just like a dream. It felt like they were both once again those naïve and hopeful thirteen-year-old kids with their whole lives ahead of them wishing for those five more years of oppression to passed and for them to be free to leave the mansion, their father, and his stupid hero legacy behind. It felt like they could be anything and anything could have happened. It once again felt like _this_ just being close in the dark was all they needed to survive another day, another hour, another mission, another insult, another failure, another _anything_ that threatened their bodies, minds, and souls.

_It felt good._

With that in mind, Vanya let out a long sigh which allowed some of the tension to leave her body. It was the same as they were kids. It was alright back then, and it was still alright now. It had been a long time, yes, but they were still Vanya and Five. They still knew each other on the primary level better than anyone else. They still understood each other. They still… _fit_ _perfectly_.

She closed her eyes just as she felt Five shift a bit behind her his arm coming to rest around her in a not intrusive manner.

She almost smiled at that recalling how he would always after a while does that. Those first few nights she told him to put it away because she had trouble falling asleep with someone's arm around her like that, but by the fourth night she grew so used to it, it was a nuisance whenever she had to fall asleep without it there. Without him there.

'I missed you,' he said with a certain tenderness which she knew he only allowed himself to show in front of her. She could the others would have seen it as a weakness and used it against him if they ever needed an opening and dad would try to force it out of him if he ever caught wind, he had it in the first place, but not her. Five could trust such a soft thing with her. She would never hurt him intentionally. Even in anger, Vanya would never use it against him. She could never be that cruel to him.

She took the hand that was lazily laying across her stomach and linked their fingers together. Five's hands were always so much warmer than hers. It made sense. He was someone who never wanted to stop or even slow down. Always thinking. Always moving. Always warm.

'I missed you too.'

He hummed before she felt him bury his face against the back of her head into her hair. Sometimes he minded that they got into his mouth or eyes during the night. However, when she asked Allison for one of her hair ties and put her hair into a ponytail for the night, he frowned at her with a distaste he usually only showed to the others.

' _What is that?_ '

' _Just so that my hair won't bother you._ '

' _No, I don't like that_ ,' he didn't wait for her reply or seemed bothered with her weak protests as he pulled the hair tie away and let her hair fall down.

She rolled her eyes at him back then thinking he was being a child, ' _It's just for tonight._ '

' _Still, won't do. You should always wear your hair down._ '

' _Why_?'

His fingers were suddenly inside her hair combing them a bit as they moved all the way to the tips, ' _It's prettier like this._ '

It was always easy for Five back then to make her heart feel like it skipped a beat. He would just say something _nice_ and absolutely _amazing_ and _warm_ and every single positive adjective she could think of sounding as nonchalant and bored as ever and look at her in a way that made it clear he meant what he said even if he couldn't bring himself to prove it any other way and Vanya would get this tight and warm feeling inside her chest which threatened her health and sanity.

* * *

Five was gone before she woke up in the morning.

Vanya knew it was an option and told herself, she was fine with it and that dread and sense of disappointment inside her stomach were probably because she ate something nasty yesterday. She went along with her day. Just because Five was back, it didn't mean she should rearrange her life or anything. She hardly knew him. One comforting and pleasant night with the best sleep she had in years didn't change the fact that he was a stranger she needed to get to know and familiar with again if he was up for it of course.

She dealt with her students throughout the afternoon and then practice before she heard some commotion outside her apartment.

At first, she thought it was her neighbor Mrs. Kowalski once again looking for her car, Mr. Puddles, but when she opened the door she found Five with a very intimidating look on his face looking at someone with cold eyes as they head down the stairs. It was a new look, Vanya didn't see before probably because it was a part of years she wasn't around him. Years, they spent apart, and he had been through things she dismissed as a time-traveling head injury.

'Uh,-'

'How old are the students that you take?' he asked in a beat looking at her. Once his eyes landed on her the look melted in a neutral one which she grew to associate this new Five with. Before Five's looks were usually daring with a sense of ego and intelligence. Now it was more calculative and secretive falling in line with what little he told her about the apocalypse and what happened to him. Except for when he actually spoke about it. Then it made him look smaller and troubled by what happened. Revealing emotions Five rarely showed because he never had been through such a thing and to such extent when they were young. It was hard for Vanya to look at him yesterday sensing those feelings while he spoke about those events. Maybe that was why she dismissed his words so quickly. Perhaps, it was too much for her and it was easier to mark them as untrue rather than help him deal with them and allow him safe heaven to talk about them.

She wet her lips ignoring his question and saying instead, 'I'm sorry about yesterday.'

His expression melted but his eyes revealed confusion, 'For what?'

'Not believing you about the apocalypse…I'm not…I'm not like you guys. It's hard for me to imagine it-these things in general, but…I should have believed you. I believe you, Five,' she said hoping she could make the sincerity of her words with her apologetic behavior. It was still a stretch to say she _believed_ the world was meant to end in less than seven days, but she did believe Five went through something horrible and excruciating and deserved someone to be able to sit tight and listen to him as he would try to deal with it. He trusted her with that. The least she could do was to be that person for him.

His eyes scanned her face carefully. With him looking the same way he did when he left, they were face to face something Vanya was rarely allowed to do with people given that she barely grew an inch since she was a child.

She knew he was taking her apart, trying to determine if she was telling the through and if she had any other motive. Whatever he found must have been satisfying enough because he nodded ever so slightly and with the same voice he used last night he said, 'I picked you because you're not like the others. Because you listen and don't let your ego and bullshit get in the way of rational thinking. In its essence, it can be interpreted that I did so because you're not like us. You're…,' she knew he wanted to say _ordinary_ again, and she tried to brace herself for it. She couldn't help but feel a stab of resentment whenever he used the word. He knew how much she hated that word and how much it hurt her to hear it. For a moment last night when he started to explain and justify using it she thought, he realized it and tried to make it right though. She could forgive him for that at least.

Five's words got lost in his throat as one blink caused his face to soften perhaps because he saw her tense a second ago, 'But…I didn't say it to hurt you-'

'I know-'

'No, you don't,' he cut her off firmly, but with the soft look still present on his face, 'You…it was always spitted at you like it was a curse word, but it's not. The fact that you were like that in a house surrounded by us makes you extraordinary in your own way,' he brushed the back of his neck and looked away suddenly making it clear his own words made him feel uncomfortable.

'Last night, I said it because I meant it in an uplifting way. That because you were like that you are the only person I could talk to.'

If she didn't know better, she would think he was growing shy in front of her eyes with how he started to shift in look anywhere but at her.

It didn't make the situation less awkward, but it did help with her own guilt and to feel like she was getting some control out of it, 'Maybe we should both put it all past us and paint last night as stressful and new for the both of us. It had been a while since we were together after all.'

Five's green eyes finally jumped back at her, and his hand fell to the side of his body as he slowly straightened himself looking slightly taller and once again confident, 'I accept. May I come in?'

'Seems like a pointless question since you already broke and enter yesterday twice, but sure,' she said quickly but offered him a bit of a smile to make sure she was teasing and not actually upset about it.

He walked inside with a slight smirk of his own and for a second there was this odd, good nature atmosphere between them that made it almost seem like they could co-exist in the daylight the way they use to as well as they did in the dark.

'By the way, how old are most of your students?'

'From seven to twelve?' she asked not really sure and started to count when did her oldest student told, Mandy, told Vanya her birthday was.

'There was a sketchy-looking individual claiming that he was your student. He looked about thirty,' said Five with a grave voice with a certain edge to it, 'If he comes here again, don't let him in and text me. Here's my number.'

He spun around and handed her a card. The fact that he had a card and just gave her his phone number somehow distracted her from asking why the man was sketchy and then Five dragged her into a conversation about what would be the best way to infiltrate a doctor's office in the city. Her doubted her inputs were any useful, but it felt good and interesting to discuss such a topic with Five who never seemed to be bored when she was talking.

* * *

Something was off.

Five wasn't one-hundred percent sure what it was, but something was quite wrong. Apart from the less obvious things, the most obvious one seemed to be the lack of any lead to the glass eye or what would be the starting point of the events that lead to days away apocalypse.

He still had one option, but Five rather thought about asking his _siblings_ for help than to actually consider going back to the Handler and the other Commission's dogs and their twisted morals.

For now, all Five couldn't do much but stalk the doctor, look around for clues and return to Vanya's apartment for the night. She didn't comment on it, and after the second time, he turned up there stopped leaving a pillow and blanket for him on the couch, and rather kept it inside her room.

It was a bit concerning that he managed to _fall_ into old habits of seeking her after a long disappointing day the way he used to when they were kids, but Five had too much on his plate to dwell on this as well.

'You're going to figure out something,' said Vanya suddenly gentling touching his shoulder. He didn't realize he got lost in thoughts working while ruining another one of her walls.

He wasn't sure if she still believed everything he told her about the apocalypse, but she did seem more worried about it with each passing day that might have been some proof that she did consider the possibility that the world was about to end in less than four days.

She deserved to know the truth, and he needed to talk to someone about it.

_For better or worse._

He must have gotten lost in his equations again because the next thing he knew was a knock on the front door and the weak sound of a shower coming from Vanya's bedroom. She must have told him she was about to take one, but he probably didn't even register her.

Putting the almost empty pen down on the pile of others, he made his way to the door careful about opening them. Vanya was a creature of solitude. It wasn't always her fault, but people tended to stay away from her blind to her qualities and how amazing she really was. At times it upset Five that someone so dear to him didn't receive the gratitude and attention she deserved. However, more often than not Five was selfishly glad to be the only one intelligent enough to see just how amazing and worthy Vanya was.

When he opened the door, he frowned knowing even if his face was childlike it would have the same effect on the intruder as it did on bad guys they fought back in the day, 'I think I told you, Ms. Hargreeves doesn't take new students at the moment. Try again _never_.'

The sketchy man from a few days ago had returned. Five barely caught him as he appeared the first time. He was clearly someone with hidden motives as Five watched in silence partly hidden by the stairs how the man _practiced_ a handshake and smile. He didn't like him. Obviously, he was up to no good, and Five didn't buy whatever half-ass excuse he tried to think up on the spot when he called him up on his bullshit.

'Oh, uh,' the man clearly wasn't expecting Five to stick around the apartment this late which was why he probably showed up again. Not weird at all to show up at a woman who lives alone apartment in the night hours. Five didn't like this. What did the man want from Vanya? Who the hell was he?

'What do you want?' asked Five focused on the man, but still keeping his ear toward the bedroom to be sure he would catch when the water would stop running.

The man tried to pull on an awkward smile he probably taught was charming, but Five was always paranoid, and working for the Commission brought that little quirk to an all-time high.

When the man's eyes shifted somewhere behind him probably trying to see if he would be able to call out for Vanya while his hand tried to snatch something from his pocket, Five didn't waste time.

He slammed the door into his elbow as he tried to pull out his knife at him, and then before the man could even realize what was happening, picked the knife, jumped behind the stranger, and stabbed him into the back efficiently paralyzing him. The man fell to his knees ready to scream which Five quickly muffled with his hand over his mouth and nose. He tried to fight, but Five was a professional who probably knew how to do this before he could walk even if his body was currently barely getting to puberty.

'Right now, you don't have many options,' he said carefully while looking around. Vanya only had one neighbor on the floor, whose TV was too loud for her to be able to hear any commotion from the hallway.

'Tell me what were your intentions with Ms. Hargreeves, and I will let you live,' he lied smoothly knowing the hope of survival was always a strong motivation for one to spit his guts.

He let his words sink into the man's mind before he let his hand go. He didn't worry much. If the man even tried anything, Five would just pull the knife which would kill him on the stop, 'So?'

The man let out a few pained groans and other sounds before he confessed, 'I-I-I have your father's journal…I just…I just wanted to talk to her. I swear. She…I thought we were the same. Both…hurt by your dad. Both overlooked.

Upon hearing the man's babbling Five frowned, but became even more interested in man's involvement in Vanya's life.

'Where's the journal?' he asked just as he caught a fainted sound of Vanya's voice.

* * *

It took Five a while to get rid of the body and evidence, but mostly because he paused every once and while to read more of dad's journal and think about it all. In the end, it was close to 3 A.M, but if it meant saving the world, a restless night or two meant nothing.

_Vanya had powers._

_Vanya caused the apocalypse._

_Vanya would do it again and again until he would put an end to it._

Afterward, he returned to Vanya's place and found that the second pillow and blanket were waiting for him on her bed.

He wanted to let her sleep for a bit longer. She had students the next day and rehearsals. She would be tired if he woke her up now. So instead, he sat on her side of the bed and watched her sleep. She was young. Not a child, but still young. She was at the beginning of her adult life really with countless of possibilities even if she didn't know about it. She was different. More reserved, more closed off, less hopeful but she was still Vanya. She was still an observer rather than a talker. She still wanted to help people and cared for them no matter how much they hurt her. She probably resented a lot of things that happened to her and the people who did those things, but watching her sleep oblivious and innocent, Five found it hard to believe she would want to kill those people. Hurt perhaps. People were capable of many things when they were pushed to the corner or angry, but to in good conscious and unprovoked kill them. That was more his style than hers.

With that in mind, he knew, he didn't have much of a choice. There was only one way to make sure there wouldn't be an apocalypse.

Before he could make up his mind, he woke her up finding some fraction of comfort in the way she brushed her eyes with the back of her hand calling out his name in her hoarse and sleepy voice, 'Five?'

'I have to leave for a bit, but I will come back, okay?' he said feeling his heart sinking as he spoke those words. He knew he would have to do that. He knew that even before entered her apartment, yet saying it out loud felt crushingly heavy.

Upon hearing that she looked up at him probably remembering how she must have felt the first time he left all those years ago, 'W-when will you be back?' her voice broke a bit before she finished her question revealing all her emotions.

'In a couple of weeks. Hopefully, I would look better too,' his poor attempt at a joke was met with though crowd as Vanya snatched his hand probably from the sleep deprivation looking like she was ready for a fight, a war even before she let out a desperate sigh and nodded, 'O-okay, just…be careful.'

_Just come back_

If that didn't settle Five's decision that Vanya was a victim in all of this, nothing would.

He allowed his hands to take a hold of her cheeks in a tender fashion before he bent down and kissed her forehead allowing himself to give everything soft and longing he ever secretly held in his heart for Vanya hoping it would offer her some comfort in her waiting, 'I'll be back. _Promise_.'

_I'm going to save everyone. Including you._

* * *

The moment Five disappeared in a flash of blue light, everything in Vanya's life fell back into the way it was before his arrival as if it never happened in the first place. At times, she was almost sure it didn't really happen to expect for a call from Luther asking if she had seen their runaway brother because he hadn't shown up in the mansion in a while.

The conversation was brief and a bit awkward the way it usually was when Luther tried to be brotherly with her, but in the end, he did get her to smile when he told her to take care of herself and call him sometime. She wasn't sure she would, but it was nice to believe not all of her siblings blindly hated her at this point.

Life went by, and after the fourth failed attempt, Vanya started to sleep on the couch. The bed, all of the sudden, was just too big for her petite body. Not to mention unnaturally cold for April nights. She knew it was probably just in her head. But it was hard to be alone after she got to experience what it was like to have someone in her apartment, her life even if only for a couple of days. She never really had that. All her boyfriends and girlfriends didn't even really deserve to be called that as they were more like daily or weekly events.

_It was hard to be without Five again._

When he finally showed up about three weeks later, the relief that washed over her body almost caused her to stumble on her feet, 'Are you alright?'

* * *

He blinked at her confused. Honestly, until that very moment, Five didn't even realize he came to her apartment. He needed a couple of hours to get clean clothes and wash away the blood from his body. The mansion's showers were used to that so he didn't even think twice about disgracing Vanya's apartment with that dirt. But afterward, instead of going to bed and rest or for a drink, he found himself here in front of Vanya's door with her big brown eyes looking at him with a mixture of relief and concern he recognized all so when from their childhood days whenever they came back from a mission all dirty, smelly and bloody with broken bones and damaged faces looking like shit.

It took him a moment to register her question.

She didn't ask him where he was, what happened, or why he came. Her first instinct as always was to ask if he was alright which now that he thought about it filled his slightly empty at the moment mind and soul with warmth and feelings, he thought the Commission had long since burnt out of him with guns, blood, and murder.

'Peachy,' he said dryly knowing not even Vanya who still had some part of her that was a desperate optimist and naïve girl would buy.

She stepped aside urging him to come in quickly closing and locking the door behind him as if it would somehow protect him. It was a reflex. He knew that. It was impossible that something as a chain, lock, and old wooden door would stand a chance against _any_ of Commission agents. Even the absolute worse ones.

'I had to take care of the future…well further along the way future,' he said frowning a bit at the almost apathetic way his voice came out. It was a long couple of weeks with endless planning and stress and fights. Maybe he was just tired and without the adrenaline, he was starting to crash down.

When Vanya's hand appeared on his shoulder it was like a wake-up call making him once again come to the realization that he was truly here in her apartment with her. Odd.

'Did you?'

'For now,' he said and let his hand scratch the back of his neck. His muscles were burning a bit now. Young body or not. It still had its limits, 'I helped take a rouge group in the agency take down the old management. Probably secured us like twenty or thirty years before those arrogant pricks decide to screw everything up again in another way.'

His bones felt heavy for some reason. Not the way they did when they were indicating to him that his body was growing, but more like when they were actually heavy threatening to bring him down to the ground.

'But for now, you can rest,' she said not exactly hopefully but in a way which told him she wanted him to rest for his own good and her sake.

He glanced at her.

He wasn't sure what it was. Maybe it was the fact that he came back again. Maybe it was the fact that he came back at all, or maybe it was something completely else that had nothing to do with him, but Vanya looked a lot better than she had the first time he saw her. She was still concerned about him, but her face was less pale and blank and blank more vivid and alive than he had seen since he came to 2019.

'Are you hungry? I made dinner,' Vanya said looking a bit embarrassed probably because she knew she wasn't a great cook.

Five didn't really care. Sure, he ate better when he got recruited by the Commission, but before that, he ate anything, he could including dirt, bugs, and mud. Compare to that Vanya's cooking skills were of a master chef.

He offered her a brief nod, and she quickly rushed to the kitchen picking up a plate and moving to the oven to fill it.

'You made a lot,' he commented eyeing the content of her pots not really thinking much of it just watching her work reminding himself that the moment he would sit down he wouldn't be able to get up again at least for several hours. He was tired beyond belief.

'I started to make more in case you showed up,' she said in a rushed voice probably trying to bury the sentence altogether as she quickly added, 'You can sit on the couch? I will bring it over. We can watch something on my laptop like before?'

Mechanically his feet brought him to the living room area of her small apartment where they stooped. His mind understood what she said, but he found himself surprised by her words. She was waiting for him. She arranged her routines and life just in case he showed up again. Did that mean she cooked more food for three weeks straight? Just in case…

_She was waiting for him._

He turned around to face her just as she brought the plate toward him. She was still here. They were all still here. It was weeks after the apocalypse and everyone was alright and alive. He stopped it. He did it. He saved them. He saved her.

_And she was waiting for him all this time._

* * *

His hands were suddenly on her wrists. For a second Vanya assumed he was trying to help her with the plate, but when she glanced over at his face, she realized there was something else going. She couldn't explain the look on Five's face. It was a strange combination of fear, seriousness, awkwardness. Something which she rarely if ever saw in Five's face or body language. No matter the situation, Number Five always presented himself like he either belong where he was or was disinterested in it. He never looked awkward or hesitant the way ordinary people did when confronted with something they weren't used to or which they didn't know how to deal with.

'Y-you waited for me,' his voice was also strange as it was filled with even more emotions than those that danced across his face.

She blinked trying to gather her thoughts about the situation.

'Well…yeah,' she said knowing she sounded as awkward as she felt in that moment realizing why he said it and what it meant.

His lips parted like he wanted to say something again, but no words came out. His hands against her wrist were nicely warm, and the pressure was oddly comforting reminding her not to let go of the plate still raised between them.

It occurred to Vanya then that Five got taller. Not by a lot. It had been only a couple of weeks, but it was definitely more inches than those first few weeks when first realized and accepted that he was. She had to tilt her head up in order to see his face properly. Soon he would be just like everyone else taller than her. Would that be the only characteristic that he would inherit, or would there be others? Would he think of her as useless, or boring? Would he lose all interest in her and leave her behind? Would he become someone she didn't recognize at all?

'Why?'

'You're you,' she replied before she could properly think about it wondering how much his face change would once he would be an adult. He was always handsome so she was pretty sure he would stay that way. But maybe she was being biased.

His hands lowered her wrists while his thumbs started to slowly rub circles against her skin. They were nicely warm and firm. It was strange in a good way to have someone to touch and who could touch you.

His eyes ran across her face as if he tried to divide every inch of it to be able to read her better, 'How long would you have waited? If I didn't show up today…,' he eased up on his grip letting her know he would let her go soon so she should make sure she wouldn't let the plate fall down, 'how long?'

She watched him for a moment not sure how to answer privately a bit cross with him for asking such a loaded question. Did he expect her to say something romantic like _forever_ or something a bit more on the edge of the line of something more and something within the things they could say like _how long would you need me to?_

'For a while I guess,' she said her voice carrying a hint of a nervous giggle, 'My record is seventeen years after all.'

The moment of silence that followed after that was so heavy Vanya thought her knees might give up and she would fall down any moment. It didn't have to mean anything. It didn't mean anything. They barely talked about such things as the future and what his coming back really meant or changed between them. The last time they were together they were kids naïve and with everything that could really matter just in front of them. Now they were both adults. They both had been through a lot of things. They both survived and experienced a lot of things and knew what life was really about.

It didn't help at all that Five held her gaze with his burning his intensely icy green eyes into hers as if he could cross every wall and resistance until he would be able to see into the pit of her existence, her soul.

Finally, after what felt like a literal eternity during which Vanya was sure her heart was planning to give up, Five accepted the plate from her hands and nodded with an uncharacteristically soft face, 'My was forty-five. So you will have to find satisfaction in the second place, Vanya. I have no intention of ever having you win this one.'

_I have no intention of ever having you wait that long for me again._

She swallowed loud enough that everyone would hear.

His smile was soft and secretive although Vanya knew exactly what he meant so there was no point to it. She still found it adorable and heartwarming realizing just how much she missed those little smiles he used to have only for her growing up. He could smirk and be cheeky with everyone, but Vanya liked to think soft Five was just for her, 'Always so competitive.'

He sat down on her couch, 'Only in things that I deem important.'

'Sure,' she said as she went to bring her laptop and turn on some movie she wanted to watch today anyway. It felt good. Domestic. Like the past couple of weeks of his absence were just a day or two. They fit together. She wanted to believe it. She did believe it. It meant a lot to her, and she hoped in her heart that it meant a lot to him as well.

It was barely an hour after Five was done with his food that he fell asleep against her shoulder probably in the process of dozing off for quite a while.

She didn't blame him. He looked exhausted physically and mentally. Whatever, he was doing was a lot even for someone like him. She made her feel cute pleasant little things like imaginary butterflies or confetti in her stomach that despite how tired he was he came to her like he promised he would.

Quietly and with gentles moves, Vanya paused the movie and closed her laptop and then carefully lied Five down on his side against the couch, her bed in his absence. He didn't even stir and looked more peaceful than she thought she would ever see him again.

It caused her to smile and gently kiss his cheek before she took a place against his chest not sure if she would be able to fall asleep so soon, but determinate to stick close to him at least for a while so he wouldn't be alone if he woke up.

She liked the thought of neither of them having to wake up alone anymore.

* * *

Five blinked and looked down at Vanya who was quietly laying next to him with one hand over his side and the other pressed against his chest where she was currently staring, 'Did I fall asleep?'

She looked up at him slowly not even all that surprised that he caught her like this, 'Yes. Uh…,' she bit her lip for a micro-second before she explained, 'I didn't want you to wake up alone.'

Again, the dark matter of warmth formed inside his chest upon hearing her say that. He was either getting used to it or he was still worn out because the usual panic and need to a step back or look away didn't appear.

Instead, he let his hand brush her back in a slow but firm motion pushing her even more against his chest, 'Thanks, Vanya.'

She looked at his chest again silently humming something.

'Do you want to go to the bedroom?' she asked him slowly looking up with her head lifting before her eyes did. Whatever she was looking at on his chest really caught her interest.

'This is fine,' he said not really in the mood to move just pulling her even closer. Since they were pretty close it only ended up with pressing her closer for a second and then returning to the close proximity they were laying before practically already pressed against one another completely.

'Okay,' she said and looked at his chest again. He realized she was thinking about something, but since her face didn't reveal any stress or worry, he let it be for now closing his eyes and dozing off some more in the comfort of Vanya's arms and on her couch.

Before sleep took him again, he was pretty sure he heard Vanya whisper, 'Welcome back, Five.'

Even in his sleep, Five smiled.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, sorry it took so long to post anything, but I was in this weird headspace. I guess. So I didn't really feel like writing or even thinking about writing for a while. I hope you liked the story, and that everyone is doing okay and is staying safe along with their loved ones. Have a nice day


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